Well I've got stagefright here tonight ladies and gentlemen, I'm really sorry that this gig isn't working out. You know how it is when you get stagefright, you urinate in your pants you defecate in your pants you throwup on stage what can I say it's embarrassing...

This is one of my favorite little tunes it's called "Splooey at Zero Gs". We've got Mike on the keyboards tonight, he's one hell of a keyboardist. Look at this, he's straight from an engagement. Well, he's straight from an engagement, or a wedding it looks like actually. Just listen to his rosey little fingers tickle these ivories for you tonight ladies and gentlemen. You're gonna love this and if you don't love this, you're gonna love our five incredible guests tonight.

First of all we have Ward holding the microphone for brad Boyle and you can hear them oohing and ahhing delicately their tender little voices into the microphones. These are a couple of the most delicate little guys you'll ever see. They're really renowned for their sensitive voices and really, what can I say, they are sensitive guys. I'm a sensitive kind of guy, I know I'm rare--let me fuck you, how's that.

And I have money.

I think Dik's the poet here tonight. He's really come up with some incredible lyrics, fans and I mean I really like to hand over the microphone cause I can't think of a fucking thing to say. Me I speak through my guitar, Dale speaks through his mouth.

Spence, Spence you're getting less dense!

Spence, its not nice to mock the dead ladies and gentlemen but we do have a party here tonight, we do have a party. This guy looks like...

Spence, Spence you're getting less dense!
Who needs beers?